How to Wear Denim-on-Denim with Confidence
I used to spend hours scouring Pinterest, trying to figure out how to build a "stylish" uniform so I looked like I had it all together.
I wanted someone to TELL ME how to tuck my shirt, buy jeans that actually fit, mix denims, cuff my sleeves, and wear big earrings. I wanted someone to TELL ME how to wear boots with dresses, leggings with dresses, and jackets OVER dresses.
I'd find tutorials, follow them to a T, and then feel absolutely paralyzed because... what if I was doing it wrong?!
You guys are tracking this, right?
I didn't want to do it wrong, so I found a rule to help me do it right, but then I felt paralyzed by the rule because I was afraid to do it wrong.
Newsflash: This isn't about the clothes at all.
This is a LEGAL MATTER. This is about RIGHT and WRONG.
This is about the dreaded... Fashion Police.
But are there... FASHION POLICE? For real? What "RULES" are they enforcing? Who/what are they protecting us from? And who wrote those damn RULES anyway?
We WANT someone to tell us the "rules" so that we can avoid taking risks and making mistakes. And YET... the exact rules we wanted to know and follow so we wouldn't do it wrong, are the same rules that keep us stuck in the fear of doing it wrong.
Damned if you do. Damned if you don't.
Gals, I'm here to tell you... THERE ARE NO FASHION POLICE.
In fact, there aren't any REAL FASHION RULES, either!
Let's play it out for a second, because I KNOW I'm gonna get some resistance on this.
YOU: I love the denim-on-denim look, but I don't know how to do it. What are the rules for "pulling it off" without looking foolish?
ME: Try all the combos! Try wearing the same color denim on top AND on bottom. Try lighter denim on top, and darker denim on bottom. Flip it around, and try wearing darker denim on top, and lighter denim on bottom. Add a third denim layer. Add a denim sweater. Or a denim scarf. Or a pair of denim looking earrings. Try lightweight denim, and heavy-weight denim. Try distressed denim.
YOU: Umm. I don't want to do that much work. I don't trust myself. I'm afraid to do it wrong.
ME: Listen, there's no "official" right/wrong way to mix denims. There's just "what's right for you", and only YOU can decide that.
YOU: Of course there's a right and wrong way! I read magazines, you know! I saw an article that gave a whole list of do's and don'ts for wearing double-denim!
ME: Yep, and how's that working for ya? You've read the rules... and now you're paralyzed. The rules haven't empowered you. They have disempowered you... straight into the FEAR OF DOING IT WRONG.
Rules exist to protect people, places and/or things. They're designed to teach us respect, reverence and responsibility.
Just for kicks, let's LOOK at some LEGIT double-denim "rules" that I JUST found on the internet, to see if 1) they protect us, or 2) teach us respect, reverence and responsibility.
1. The denims NEED to be different shades.
2. Wear denims in the same shade. (ummm... but what about #1??)
3. Don't wear a western belt with double-denim.
4. Use denim shades to hide parts of your body. (Did they just say... HIDE!???!)
5. Don't wear denim accessories.
Protection? Nope.
Respect? Nope.
Reverence? Nope.
Responsibility? Nope.
Yet, we spend so much energy FEELING FEARFUL of "doing it wrong"?
Let me show you how I HAVE WORN double-denim recently.
Yikes! Someone call the FASHION POLICE! I've broken a slew of the cardinal double-denim RULES!! And I felt GREAT doing it!!
denim sneakers (!!), with double denim
denim scarf, denim sweater, denim jeans AND a denim jacket, ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
matching denims
mixed denims
denim-colored necklace... WITH DOUBLE DENIMS!
western-belt with my double-denims
You guys! LIBERATION from arbitrary rules looks good on EVERY woman.
If you put something on your body, and it FEELS GOOD, then wear it. Own it. EMBODY IT. Be proud of yourself for stepping away from the rules, and connecting to your own FEELS. That takes guts.
And if you ask me, a gutsy woman IS a STYLISH and EMBODIED woman.
No rules necessary.
Love, Stasia