My Dress Was Comfortable, So I Donated It
The other day, I stopped by my local co-op to grab a few groceries. I had a list, and by-golly I was sticking to it. But right as I walked in the door, I saw them.
Raspberries. Juicy red raspberries that reminded me of SUMMER, on this dark, dreary day.
And they were ON SALE! Two packages for $5!!
I popped them into my cart, anxious to beat back the rainy-day blues with a summertime-snack that tasted like sunshine!
As soon as I got home, I unpacked the groceries, poured both packages of raspberries into the colander for a rinse, and noticed that almost every single raspberry was MOLDY in the middle!
Womp. Womp.
You know that feeling of disappointment you get when you see something in the store, fall in love, then get home only to discover it's not at all what you thought it was??
I was feeling it. Hard.
And it reminded me of a dress I had bought recently that I THOUGHT was going to be perfect... but wasn't.
When I found the dress at the thrift store, I thought it was a dream come true.
100% cotton
my favorite color/pattern combo
a great price ($6)
the perfect length
And OMG it had POCKETS!
But, when I put the dress onto my body, I was SHOCKED to realize that it didn't make me FEEL good. I felt frumpy, shapeless, and uninspired.
I tweaked. I adjusted. I tried all kinds of combos. But no matter what I tried, I couldn't shake those feelings.
I was so confused. It was my dream dress!
Here’s the thing... in my haste to check off all the boxes (material, color, pattern, price, length, pockets!), I failed to consider how the dress made me FEEL.
Was it comfortable. Yep! Sure was.
But that is NOT ENOUGH for me. I need my clothes to make me FEEL good too!
After some ninja-level analysis, I realized that the waist on the dress was about two inches higher than my actual waist, so it was hanging all wonky on my body, making me feel like I was wearing a dress made for somebody else's body!
I wanted to love the dress, but it just didn't love me back. It was actually kinda hurting my feelings... and let me tell you, I refuse to let a dress hurt my feelings!!
I’d rather wear ONE DRESS - that makes me feel good - over and over again, than spend one second in a dress that's calling me names!
Have you ever done this? Bought something that looked perfect in the store... only to find out later that it hurt your feelings? Did you blame/shame yourself for it? Or learn from it and move on?
Getting distracted by what you want to see is normal. It happens with raspberries. It happens with dresses. (Heck, it can even happen with partners! Yikes!) You can't see all the things, all the time.
But what you can do is STOP, pay attention, pivot and learn.
When you're not feeling good, you gotta ask yourself what's not working, and then make adjustments.
In this case, I needed to let go of the dress, because it wasn't right for my body.
(BTW, I'll be the first to admit it didn't look bad, but it made me feel bad, and that's the kicker. Inside-Out Congruency is all about tuning in to your insides. That's where the magic happens!)
I want to invite YOU to close your eyes and ask yourself... "How do I FEEL in my clothes RIGHT NOW?" If something feels off, I want you to KNOW it's not your body. I know that for sure because your body is NEVER the problem.
If something isn't working for you, see if you can figure out one reason WHY. Is the waistline too high or low? Is it the color? Is it the fit? Is it the wrong size?
If you really want to learn something, take a selfie and study it! (Sometimes I can't "see" what's "off" until I can actually SEE what's off.)
And that right there is one way to learn what does and doesn't work for you on your today-body. And BONUS - it reminds you to STOP blaming your body when your clothes don't feel good!
#YourBodyIsNotTheProblem
xo
Stasia