I thought I couldn't. So I did.

Anytime the words, "I would NEVER..." or "I can't..." enter my mind, I stop what I'm doing, take a deep breath and say to myself... WELL SHOOT, SOUNDS LIKE I BETTER. I sat on the sidelines of my own life for too damn long, terrified of looking silly or making a fool of myself, and I refuse to live my life that way any longer.

That's how I started painting.

Back in February, when I was sitting at the base of a magnificent waterfall after a gorgeous 4 mile hike into the far reaches of Sabino Canyon, Arizona, my friend Evi reached into her backpack, pulled out her watercolor painting supplies and said to me, "Do you want to paint?"

My first thought was... Paint? I can't paint. I'm pretty sure I failed art in middle school.

So I took a deep breath, and said, "YES, I'd love to."

My eyes immediately filled with tears. My heart started racing. My hands started shaking.

There it was... my body's response to "but what if I fail."

It took a good minute for me to ground myself. I knew I was safe. I knew Evi wouldn't laugh at me. I knew that the threat of failure was, in this case, imaginary.

I asked her to show me HOW to paint, but she didn't. She handed me these neat little paper-watercolor-cards, a cool water-filled-brush, and a single blank postcard and said... "just paint."

I painted for 20 minutes, and heck if I didn't make a painting.

I was SO PROUD of myself. Not because my painting was masterful, but because I was brave enough to look fear-of-failure in the eyeballs and say... you're not highjacking me today!

The second I got home, I ordered myself (and Zealand) a pile of painting supplies, and put together a couple of painting kits (see bottom of email for supplies list) for our weekly Sunday hikes.

I painted from the summit of Mount Monadnock in New Hampshire (top-left), and from the summit of Mount Equinox in Vermont (top-right).

When we decided to take a last-minute trip to Virginia and DC last week, I brought my supplies with me.

I painted sitting on The Mall in Washington DC (top-left), I painted Dark Hallow Falls in Shenandoah National Park (top-right), I painted from the summit of Old Rag in Shenandoah National Park (bottom-left), and I painted from the Billy Goat Trail in Maryland, looking out over the Potomac River (bottom-right).

And then when we got home, I painted from the summit of Mount Norwottuck in Massachusetts.

6 weeks. 8 paintings. 6 states + the District of Columbia.

If I close my eyes, I can picture every landscape that I painted. I remember the way the sun and wind felt against my skin, the way the shifting light changed the depth and vibrance of the landscape, and the way the earth felt beneath me as I sat, rooted to the ground, deeply aware of my place and space.

For a moment I considered whether or not I "should" take a lesson and learn a few watercolor moves, or simply enjoy the PRACTICE of painting.

A couple of folks from Instagram messaged me to say I'd be "so much happier" if I took a lesson and learned HOW to paint.

I thought long and hard about it and realized... I don't want to learn HOW to paint. That's not why I paint!

When I paint, I step into a world were CURIOSITY + WONDER are in the driver's seat, and PLAY is riding shotgun. I feel giddy when I paint. Alive. Free. Wild-hearted. In fact, the joy I feel when I paint often times has me giggling with delight for no reason at all!

I don't believe for one second that learning HOW to paint could make me any happier than that.

Getting dressed is the same way, if you ask me.

As Iris Apfel once said, "Great personal style is an extreme curiosity about yourself."

She didn't say anything about the rules. She didn't suggest you google a bunch of how-to videos. In fact, she didn't say one-single-thing about the clothes. She said, "Great personal style is AN EXTREME CURIOSITY ABOUT YOURSELF."

When you paint for pleasure, I think "an extreme curiosity about yourself" is all you need. ️

xo Stasia

---

WHAT'S IN MY PAINTING KIT

• Zipper pouch from the thrift store

• Pencil, for writing down the date/location on the backside of my painting

• Water brush HERE (I only carry one, size M, but they come in different sizes)

• Viva Colorsheets HERE (these are the paints, believe it or not)

• Watercolor Postcards HERE

• Tissue, that I use over and over again, to clean my brush

FLOP-BARBLE-SPLAT: Adventures in Rope Swing Jumping

I just got back from an afternoon on the river, and I'll tell you what... I am feeling pretty darn proud of myself. Because today, I did a thing. A thing I have NEVER done before. Ever. In my whole life. 

You know I love me a good adventure, but even I have my limits. And rope-swings are one of them. 

They LOOK EASY enough, but dang, you gotta have some kinda hand-arm-core strength/coordination to hold on to the rope and swing, less you want to FLOP-BARBLE-SPLAT yourself into the water like an old wet towel. 

I've always had strong legs... but strong arms? Not so much. 

I've never dared to jump from a rope swing because... 

What if I can't hold on.
What if I can't get my legs up. 
What if I make a fool of myself.

I've paddled this section of river before, and never once did I notice those darn rope swings. Outta mind, outta site. Once I put them on my no-way-never list, my smarty-pants brain was able to NOT SEE THEM whenever I traveled this section of river. 

Until today, when my 7 year old son about fell out of his seat when he saw them. He wanted to give it a go, and I thought to myself, GOOD FOR HIM! He's perfect for this kind of sport. He's strong. He's agile. He's coordinated. He's GOT THIS.

He crawled out of his boat, stood on the top of the rock, grabbed onto the rope... and froze. 

He couldn't do it. I cheered for him. I told him I believed in him. I coached him. 

But he was too afraid. 

Then it came... MAMA, I'LL DO IT IF YOU DO IT.

Shit. 

A few years ago I decided that whenever a NO-WAY-NEVER opportunity popped up in front of me, I needed to stop, listen to what my inner-yammerings had to say, intentionally let those thoughts go, and then do the damn thing. 

Well, my default inner yammering was saying... your arms are just too damn skinny to carry your ass over the water, so you best say HELL NO, because if you try, it is NOT going to be pretty. 

I can be such an asshole to myself. 

I laid those tracks probably 25 years ago, and they were STILL THERE, trying to sabotage me. 

I don't let myself talk to myself that way anymore. Nowadays, I'm on my body's team. I believe in my body. I know my body will do ITS BEST, so I refuse to berate it for not being THE BEST. 

With nothing on the line but my ego... I hopped off my paddleboard, and gave it a go. 
 

CLICK IMAGE BELOW TO WATCH THE 15 SECOND VIDEO. 

I have watched this video at least a dozen times, and it cracks me up every single time I see it. I mean, did you see my landing?!?!?  Not exactly graceful. 

But you know what, I didn't get up there to be graceful. I got up there to show my ZZ what BRAVERY looked like.

And I did it. I jumped off that rock, swung from that damn rope swing, got myself a serious case of rope burn, and fell FLOP-BARBLE-SPLAT right into the water.

All of my fears came true. And I didn't care one bit. 

I was so PROUD of myself! 

I know that sounds kind of cheesy. It's not like I was 30 feet in the air, staring death in the eyeballs or anything. But I was staring WHAT-IF-I-FAIL in the eyeballs, and that right there... that's something. 

Afterwards, my husband said to me... good thing you changed your pants all those years ago, Stasia. And I laughed. Every single time I do something brave, that's what he says to me. Because he knows that changing my pants, changed my life. 

It's probably hard to understand the connection between changing my pants, and finding the courage to jump off a rope swing, but I'll tell you what, they are inextricably connected. 

I've spent years flexing my brave muscle in my closet, always pushing up against my boundaries, kicking up to my growing edge, challenging every no-way-never I come upon. When I first started on this journey, lipstick was on my no-way-never list. So were sequins, dresses, shorts, crop-tops, cowgirl boots, headscarves, big earrings, and BIKINIS. 

Everyday I flex my BRAVE MUSCLE. Everyday my BRAVE MUSCLE gets stronger. 

Not just in one area of my life, but in ALL AREAS OF MY LIFE. 

That's how BRAVERY works.

You wanna be more adventurous? More creative? More feisty? More bold? More grounded? More fierce? More YOU? Then practice CULTIVATING BRAVERY in your closet. 

Because SHOWING UP and LIVING YOUR BEST LIFE has everything to do with BRAVERY. And your closet is hands-down one of the best places to practice. 

You just have to dare. 

You have to DARE share your ideas. Speak your truth. Stand firm. Have your voice be heard. BE SEEN. 

THIS IS THE WORK OF STYLE SCHOOL. 

If you can SEE your BIGGEST MOST BEAUTIFUL LIFE up ahead of you, and it's just out of reach because you don't quite dare... NOW IS THE TIME to join THE SEPTEMBER SESSION OF STYLE SCHOOL. 

There are less than 25 spots available. Style School will SELL OUT. Once I reach capacity, I will CLOSE REGISTRATION. Class starts on Monday, September 14th.

xo Stasia

PS. ZZ didn't need to see his mama "nail" her rope swing jump. He just needed to see her dare.

How To Pack For Your Next Adventure

I’m writing this from an outdoor cafe in the middle of the Sonoran Desert, Arizona, surrounded by saguaro (pronounced sa-WAH-ro), barrel, and prickly pear cacti.   

Gals, I'm in heaven. This place speaks to me at a SOUL-level. 

This is what I'm looking at, over my computer screen:

I started packing for this desert camping/hiking trip about an hour before we left, because honestly, that's how I roll. I've got my packing system DOWN PAT, and was able to get everything I need for a week of camping and hiking - all into my carry-on suitcase. 

Folks are always curious how I'm able to pack so lightly when I adventure, so I thought I'd share with you what I brought, and why! 

TOPS

Camping/hiking in the desert in February means I need to be prepared with warm and cold weather gear. The desert gets really chilly at night, and hot during the day, so I prepared for both!

I brought... 

• 3 t-shirts (for hiking)

• 3 sweatshirts (for evenings / cool days)

• 1 polypro top (for evenings)

• 1 sports bra (for everyday)

• 1 sports tank (for everyday)

• 1 pajama top (for sleeping)

• 1 "nice" shirt (for fancy)

After three days hiking in the same t-shirt,  I STILL passed the pit-sniff test.  👃👃👃 I have a feeling I'm gonna go home with a suitcase of unworn clothes!  But, only time will tell. 

BOTTOMS

I had space in my suitcase, so I packed a variety of bottoms, but of course, I've worn my hiking skort every-single-day since we've been here.

I brought...

• 1 pair of ankle-length leggings (for hiking)

• 1 pair of 3/4 length leggings (for hiking)

• 2 skorts (for hiking)

• 1 pair of jeans (for travel / cool non-hiking days)

• 1 pair of long johns (for evenings)

The daytime temps have been SO NICE in Tucson, I’ve worn my favorite (thrifted) skort, 4 days in a row!  (I may leave without ever even touching my leggings.)  I HAVE worn my Odlo leggings every night though, because day-um the nights have been COLD.  I'm talking FROST-ON-THE-GROUND cold. 

I also brought... 

• 1 dress (for fancy)

• my Patagonia nano-puff jacket (for evenings)

• my raincoat (for that one day of rain in the forecast)

• my bikini (just in case we find a swimming hole)

Thank goodness I brought my nano-puff jacket because, I'll tell you what... the temps drop about 40 degrees the second the sun sets. 

Let's see... what else did I bring?

• 6 pairs of undies

• 2 pairs of socks (yes, I wear the same socks over and over again)

• 1 winter hat (for those cold nights)

• 1 baseball cap (for those sunny days)

• 1 pair of sandals (for day use and the shower)

• 1 pair of hiking shoes (for... well, hiking!)

• 1 neck gaiter (to keep the sun off my neck during the day, and to keep my neck warm at night)

• 6 pairs of earrings (I like variety)

• sunglasses (for obvious reasons)

• 2 books (THIS one and THIS one)

• 1 Turkish towel (for bathing)

• my Cold Moon blanket from Dig Co (to snuggle up in the evenings)

• my toiletry bag, which includes my Mom's Stuff Salve and Day Face Balm (for skin protection)

• my headlamp (an absolute ESSENTIAL for camping)

• 1 water bottle

• 1 coffee cup

• plus a backpack full of gluten-free food for a long day of travel

That's it. Every last thing that I packed.  And it all fit 1) on my body 2) in my carry-on, or  3) in my backpack/personal item. 

In case you're wondering... that cool pink van you see in the background of my photos, with that pop-up tent on top? THAT's what we're traveling in, here in Tucson!  We rented an Escape Campervan in Phoenix... and after all of our 4-people-in-a-Prius camping trips, this thing feels like a mansion! 

Before ANY piece of clothing goes into my suitcase, I try it on to make sure it fits. My body changes on the regular. (Yours too? Yep, that's what bodies do.) I also make sure that all my tops go with all my bottoms. Finally, every item I pack needs to give me the FEELS I want to FEEL, while adventuring.

It takes some doing to find ALL THE RIGHT THINGS for my today-body and my today-feels, because sometimes what I think I want to wear doesn’t FEEL right.  Better to figure that out AT HOME, rather than three days into the trip!

Which reminds me... I'm always surprised when someone looks at me cross-eyed as soon as I start talking about how my clothes make me feel.

Truth is, I've yet to meet someone who doesn't know what BLAH, MEH or UGH feels like, when it comes to clothes.

Am-I-right? 

What you may NOT know is this: if you can notice what exactly makes you feel BLAH, MEH, or UGH! then you ALSO have all the working radar you'll need to figure out what colors, styles, and accessories make you feel BOOYAH!

Learning how to dress to feel STRONG, BRAVE, CREATIVE, BADASS, ADVENTUROUS, or [fill in the blank with EXACTLY HOW YOU WANT TO FEEL], is a game-changer. (And for me, that's a massive understatement! Ha!)

I used to feel frumpy in my clothes every. damn. day. I blamed my body. 

Sister, body shame is a crying shame.

That same body that I used to BLAME is the very reason I'm able to camp, hike, and adventure in the Arizona mountains, breathing in the freshest air, and snuggling deep into my cozy sleeping bag come nightfall.

This body of mine is a GIFT. A wonderful vehicle for all of the adventures that I've already lived, and many more that await. In fact, that Escape Campervan up there's got nothin' on this body of mine, and the same's true of yours.

How about you? When was the last time you really NOTICED how you feel in your clothing? When was the last time you blamed your body for feeling BLAH, while wearing a stained hand-me-down-from-your-honey-tee-shirt with holes, too-small jeans, or your nursing bra from 12 years ago?

When was the last time you RELISHED living in your body? And dressed like it? I wanna know if this is something you're ready to learn! And... if not, what's holding you back? Now there’s a question worth answering!

xo Stasia 

PS If dressing to FEEL how you want to feel intrigues you, then check out my other blog posts on Inside-out Congruency!

National Park Tour: What I packed for our 2-month, cross-country camping trip!

On June 21st, 2017, we packed our family-of-four in a little Toyota Prius and headed out on a two-month, cross-country, National Park Tour. Our plan was to hit 10 - 15 parks out west, and camp out all along the way. 

So that's 2 months, 14 parks, 9500 miles... with 4 people in a Prius. 

But let me step back a bit and give you a little backstory as to HOW and WHY we made this happen.

Last year, when my daughter was a third grader, I learned about the Every Kid In a Park pass program, which allows all 4th graders in the US (and their families) FREE access to all federally managed lands and waters - which includes ALL of our nation's National Parks and National Monuments. (To learn more about this initiative, started by President Obama in 2015, click HERE.)

You can actually buy a National Park pass for around $80 so it wasn't a gigantic savings, but what it did was give me the idea.  I had never ever dreamed of doing a National Park Tour before, and then all of a sudden, it was all I could think about.

What a gift this would be to my kids!  We would spend two full months together, outdoors, uninterrupted by work and laundry and toilet-bowl cleaning!

Then came the logistics. Could we do a trip like this in a Prius? Could we afford to take two months off from work? How in hell would all of our camping gear and clothes fit in such a small car? And will my husband's work EVER give him the time off? 

But you never know until you try... so we talked about it like it was going to happen for MONTHS, and then in the late spring, my husband submitted a proposal to his company, and hell if they didn't say GO FOT IT!!  

When we got the YES, we were shocked, realizing that we were really DOING IT! 

We did some rough planning, made a few camping reservations, and then before we knew it, it was time to go.

We're the last-minute type, so naturally we started packing the night before we left. 

We joked with the kids, telling them they could each bring one pair of underpants and that's it... and let me tell you, that's not far from the truth. 

SPACE. WAS. LIMITED.

We did buy a Thule rack for the top of the car so we could jam all of our camping gear up there (1 tent, 4 sleeping bags, 4 sleeping pads, 4 camping pillows, 4 chairs, 4 backpacks), but the itty-bitty back of the car had to hold all of our clothes for multiple climates (hats, fleece and rain gear, along with bathing suits, shorts and t-shirts), our cooler, all of our kitchen gear (plates, cups, bowls, table-cloth, silverware, cutting board, pots, pans, french-press, dish pan, detergent, etc.), our bathroom stuff and our dry-goods/food bin. And our mini pharmacy + first aid kit. And water. And a gajillion water bottles. And my solar shower because I WILL NOT go to bed without taking a shower first. A pile of turkish towels. And a couple of battery-operated fans. And books books books and more books. 

Up until 3 minutes before we left, we had NO IDEA how it was all going to fit. 

And just to give you a little perspective... we allowed ourselves two (2!!) carry-on sized bags... for all of our clothes, FOR TWO MONTHS!!

Let me show you what made the cut for my quarter-section of carry-on space... for better or for worse.

ACCESSORIES

You all know I'm a HUGE fan of earrings, so yes, I brought 7 pairs of them on my camping trip. As far as I'm concerned, earrings are THE BEST way to add BOLD to any outfit when it's hotter-than-hot outside because they don't touch your skin. 

TOP LEFT - Leah Pastrana
TOP RIGHT - Allison Korn Designs
BOTTOM LEFT - Nickel and Suede
BOTTOM RIGHT - handmade by a girlfriend

I brought two light-weight necklaces that can be worn long or layered together for some added fun! 

LEFT - found at an arts-market
RIGHT - Megan Auman

I ALSO brought a couple of leather cuffs... because I LOVE them, and 3 scarves (make that 2, the striped one didn't fit), because there is nothing worse than air-conditioner-neck!  Plus, adding a patterned scarf is a great way to add whim and whimsy to any fit!  

BRACELETS - handmade by a girlfriend
SCARVES - pink polka dots (ebay), pink stripe (purchased in Turkey circa 2004), and the blue chambray is from Aventura Clothing

CLOTHING

Here's where the picking gets SLIM!

Town / light hiking clothes

• 5 dresses (3 handmade-for-me patterned dresses + 2 plain colored dresses from Aventura Clothing that were both antimicrobial, which means you can wear them for days and not get stinky!)

• 1 pair of under-the-dress shortie-leggings

• 1 jean jacket

• 1 pair of sandals

Outdoorsy hiking clothes

• 3 skorts

• 2 t-shirts

• 1 hoodie + 1 long underwear top

• 1 bathing suit

• 1 baseball cap

• 3 socks

• 2 sports bras

• 1 pair of sneakers

• 1 pair of Chaco river sandals

Basically, I left my entire closet at home. 

You guys. Here is everything I brought. For two months. And no space in the car to shop along the road... unless I get rid of something.

EXTRAS

PRIORITY ONE - I hadn't spent an entire summer outdoors since doing a backpacking course through Alaska with NOLS (National Outdoor Leadership School) about 25 years ago, and I remember FRYING my skin. Not this time! So, I brought Mom's Stuff Salve day cream + night cream to keep everyone's skin good and moisturized. I also brought their piñon salve because it's super for cuts, bites, stings, scrapes, etc.  (NOTE  - the piñon salve ended up being the BEST most useful thing we packed for our trip!)

PRIORITY TWO - Since I wouldn't be working on my computer or doing any housework at night (now that's a vacation!), I thought I might go a little bananas and do some "light" reading at night.

PRIORITY THREE -  Barr Hill Gin, but I didn't get a picture of that!  (Let me be honest... this was more important than underpants!)  

Of course, the husband and kids had their share of space in the carry-on duffle bags, and as it turns out, we did a pretty darn good job packing.

For now, I'll leave you with this awkward picture, taken minutes before we hopped in the car!

Love, Stasia