I refuse to hide my body.

Question for ya. 

How many of you are getting younger?

Show of hands. 

Wait? How many? Exactly ZERO of you?

That's right. ZERO of you are getting younger. 

Interesting, isn't it, to think that NONE OF US are getting any younger, yet we live in a culture/society that teaches us that we gotta work harder to "get back" to our yesterday-body. The one we had BEFORE. When we were younger. 

Before you had a baby. Before you had surgery. Before you were diagnosed with a chronic illness. Before you had cancer. Before you hit menopause. Before you got divorced. Before the pandemic. Before grief struck. Before you gained 15 pounds for no "good reason" other than... you-have-a-body-and-it-changed.  

Here's the thing. There is ALWAYS going to be a before. 

When I was 25, I hated my body, and I wished for my 20 year old body. 
When I was 30, I hated my body, and I wished for my 25 year old body. 
When I was 35, I hated my body, and I wished for my 30 year old body.
When I was 40, I hated my body, and I wished for my 35 year old body. 

TRICKS ON ME, folks.

I was in a perpetual state of yearning for my yesterday-body, never EVER happy with my today-body. 

It never occurred to me that I was indoctrinated into a system of structural, social and societal bigotry that shames, dismisses and demoralizes fat bodies and aging bodies as being UN-ATTRACTIVE, UN-WORTHY, and UN-LOVABLE.

Nor did I consider that entire industries are counting on me hating myself so they can continue to make HUNDREDS OF BILLIONS OF DOLLAR off of my self-loathing. 

I spent most of my adult life at war with my body. Afraid of my body. Ashamed of my body. 

And here's the thing. I'm a white, straight, cis-gendered, able-bodied, thin woman living in America. 

In other words, I'm fucking privileged. And I STILL hated my body. I STILL feared what it might become. 

Gals, YOUR BODY IS NOT THE PROBLEM. 

Ageism. Racism. Sexism. Able-ism. Capitalism. Fat-phobia. 

THAT is the problem.

I absolutely REFUSE to HIDE MY BODY. I REFUSE to slink away in shame. I REFUSE to participate in a system that was designed to hijack my worthiness. 

Maybe you've been "lucky enough" to work hard and attain some kind of aesthetic today-body-satisfaction, but guess what? That doesn’t get you off the hook. Your body is going to go ahead and change. Because that's what bodies do. And eventually there will come a time when there won't be a diet or system or a cream or a procedure or a device that can "cure" your aging/changing body.

And you're going to be STUCK in your today-body. With ZERO skills of self-acceptance. 

OR, maybe you're not one of the "lucky ones" that can change your body into something you deem desirable, and you feel frustrated about that, so you're hiding your body. Waiting for your body to listen - obey - do as it’s told. 

You've pushed pause on life. 
You're waiting until you "lose that covid-15" to buy new pants. 
You're giving yourself one-more-year to lose that weight before buying yourself some clothes that make your SOUL FIRE sing. 

Here's what I think. 

THE GIG IS UP. 

Your today-body is a GOOD BODY, and it's time you start treating it as such.

How do you do that?

You say THANK YOU BODY, for being such a good body.
You say THANK YOU LEGS, for being such good legs.
You say THANK YOU ARMS, for being such good arms. 

When you show gratitude to your today-body for being a GOOD BODY that does GOOD BODY THINGS, then you are celebrating it for doing it's JOB. It's actual real and true job of supporting you as you LIVE YOUR ONE GLORIOUS LIFE!

When you show your body that kind of gratitude, your relationship with your body WILL CHANGE. 

When I was 41, I hated my body.
Now, I'm 45, and I feel Good as Hell in my today-body. And I’m done HIDING IT.

My body didn't change.
My relationship with my body changed.
Because I CHANGED how I interacted with my body. 

It's not easy, changing how you interact with your body. 

It's taken me years to RENAME, REFRAME, UNSHAME the conversations I have with and about my body, but I'll tell you what, it's one of the best things I've EVER done for myself. 

When I stopped hating myself, do you know what I found? MY VOICE. 

I have used my VOICE to cheer me, and THOUSANDS OF OTHER WOMEN on, because loving yourself is NOT EASY. 

It takes guts and commitment and tenacity and resilience to stand up to a system that’s intent on seeing you fail. 

Do you know what else it takes… COMMUNITY. 

We're up against a lot, me and you. And there is NOTHING LIKE BEING PART OF A SISTERHOOD of women who believe in you, who are committed to breaking through the noise of “too-much-ness” and “not-enough-ness” with you, and who SEE YOU in all of your worthiness, just as you are, in your one and only today-body.

Registration for the next session of Style School opens on Friday, August 28th, at noon EST.

If you're an alum, and you know someone who is itching for some revel-YOU-tionary SELF LOVE and sisterhood, then please forward this email to them. If that person itching to join the SSS sisterhood is you, then mark your calendars for Friday, August 28th, because I'll tell you what... the world is changing, and it needs YOUR VOICE, YOUR BRAVERY, YOUR FIRE more than anything right now. 

CURIOUS ABOUT THIS THING CALLED "STYLE SCHOOL"?

You're in luck, because I've gone ahead and taken TWO MEGA FOUNDATIONAL CHUNKS of the SSS curriculum, and turned them into a FREE CLASS. And I'm gonna teach it LIVE, on Thursday, August 27th at noon EST, so you can see FIRST HAND what a day-in-the-life of Style School is ALL ABOUT. 

Here's what I'll be covering in the PERSONAL STYLE FROM THE INSIDE OUT free webinar:

• What is Inside-Out Congruency

• Why I redefined BEAUTY

• How to decode your body’s shape

• How to unlock the magic of balance and proportion

Even if you don't want to do Style School, OR if you've already done Style School and just want a REFRESHER, you'll want to join this webinar because HOLY BUCKETS I'm giving out - FOR FREE - some seriously good Style School content.  Content that will challenge the way you think about style, teach you some things you've probably never learned before (hello balance and proportion), and inspire you to TRY A NEW WAY OF BEING IN YOUR TODAY-BODY. 

If you can't make it live, no big deal, because I'll be sending out the recording RIGHT AFTER THE CALL. All you gotta do is SIGN UP HERE to gain access to the webinar and the recording.  

If you've got ANY questions at all, find me on Instagram @StasiaSavasuk or send me an email and let me know. 

I'm ready and ROARING to go! 

xo Stasia 

Want to change the way you think about your today-body?

This morning, I had a thought. A revelYOUtionary thought. A thought that I think is going to change the way I respond to the dreaded "WHAT WILL PEOPLE THINK" voice that yammers on inside my head. 

Now that I've got 19 sessions of Style School under my belt, I've got a pretty good handle on the 'ole "what will people think" thought that plagues so many of us. 

Wait. 

Who am I kidding.

Now that I've got 19 sessions of Style School under my belt, I've got a pretty good handle on the "what will people think" thought that every single one of us thinks from time to time if we're living a BRAVE BOLD BEAUTIFUL life. 

Why?

Because with guts comes vulnerability. 

If you step outside your comfort zone - if you dare, if you try, if you leap - you will feel vulnerable. 

And if you feel vulnerable, you are likely going to wonder "what will people think". 

I've been wearing the SAME PAIR OF DENIM SHORTS for just about the whole summer, and every time I slip them on, I feel like I'm breaking some sort of unwritten rule that says I cannot wear the same thing day after day after day. 

I sometimes wonder what people might think... and OF COURSE my assumptions are always AGAINST ME. 

Who does she think she is?
She thinks she looks great, but she doesn't.
My goodness, why doesn't she ever change her clothes!

After letting those thoughts run rampant in my mind, I'm sometimes tempted to ditch my cut-offs for something I don't want to wear, because I'm afraid of what people might think. 

I know. Nonsense. 

My usual OVERRIDE to the "what will people think" inquiry is "what other people think of me is none of my damn business". 

It's good. I've used it for years. It's gotten me outta many'a sticky moment. 

But this morning, I imagined taking that whole inner-inquiry INTO A DIFFERENT DIRECTION. 

Instead of disrupting the "what will people think" thought with "what other people think of me is none of my damn business", I imagined thinking: WHAT WOULD I - STASIA SAVASUK - THINK. 

Huh. 

So I imagined asking myself WHAT WOULD I THINK, if I saw a woman wearing the same cut-off shorts day after day.

I'd think... DAY-UM, this woman knows what's going on! She's found something that she loves, that makes her feel HELLA GOOD, that she's not willing to give up for any consumer-driven "rules" that say we gotta have at least THIS many pairs of shorts to be worthy of beauty, love, friendship, intimacy, respect, kindness. She's valuing herself over capitalism, and I think that's pretty damn awesome. She's IN her body. Connected to her body. Feeling good in her body. I'm here for it. 

Talk about SOVEREIGNTY!

It's me, giving myself a pep-talk. A permission slip. A pat on the back for being the person I want to be. 

Let's practice. 

EXAMPLE 1.

What will people think if I wear a minidress, even though I'm 45? 

Ugh. Wrong question. Cue every worst case scenario you can imagine. 

What would I think if I saw a 45 year old woman wearing a minidress?

I'd think... she is a revelYOUtionary woman! I'd admire the way she embraces her body and the way she doesn't pay attention to any of rules that say you can't do this or that after a certain age. I'd notice how she stands, with her eyes forward, and her shoulders back, feet planted on the ground, in complete ownership of her body. I'd think to myself, I love how she's not afraid to show a little leg! No hiding. No diminishing. No shame. Just a woman, living in her body. How BEAUTIFUL is that. 

EXAMPLE 2.

What will people think if they see me wearing a bikini, even though I have cellulite?

Ugh. This question will take you to hell and back. Don't do it. 

What would I think if I saw a woman wearing a bikini, not hiding her cellulite, and just living and loving in her today body?

I'd think... LOOK AT THIS BEAUTIFUL WOMAN! She knows she's got just ONE BODY, and she's not going to waste one minute of it feeling ashamed of her body. Why should she! She's got an incredible body that does incredible body things. I'd notice her smile, her laughter, her ease. I'd see that her BEAUTY has nothing to do with the size of her body, or the smoothness of her thighs. I'd see that her BEAUTY has everything to do with how she EMBODIES her incredible human body. And in that moment, I'd feel the FREEDOM to do the exact same thing. 

EXAMPLE 3.

What will people think if they see me wearing a fancy dress, on a Tuesday, during a global pandemic?

GAHHH. Only ask this question if you want to feel like you're in 8th grade again. 

What would I think if I saw a woman wearing a dress on a regular ole Tuesday during a global pandemic? 

I'd think... now THERE is a woman who is willing to buck the stay-at-home norm of not giving a damn, and dress how she wants to FEEL. She's not waiting for permission. Or a reason. Or an excuse to "feel good". She knows her worth. She knows that life is worth celebrating, even when it's hard. Especially when it's hard. Putting in this kind of effort when the world feels like it's going to hell in hand basket takes a special kind of SAUCE, and she's got it. In fact, her SAUCE makes me want to access my own SAUCE. 

Now... I know what some of you are thinking. You're thinking, I wouldn't be as nice as you, Stasia, because truth is, I kinda think she shouldn't be wearing a minidress at her age. And I definitely think she should wear a cover-up because LORDY nobody needs to see that kind of cellulite. And let's face it, she totally thinks she's ALL THAT, wearing a dress on a regular old Tuesday, during a global pandemic. 

I get it. I used to think those thoughts too. And do you know what I've learned? That those thoughts were not born inside of me. They were PLANTED INSIDE OF ME, starting at a very young age, from my mother, who was always very critical of herself AND other women.

My criticism of other women's bodies had NOTHING to do with other women's bodies, and EVERYTHING to do with my own pain, my own hurt, my own shame, my own training. All of which was passed down to me from my mother, who projected her own pain and hurt and shame and training onto me. 

This isn't something to be ashamed of. IT'S SOMETHING TO HEAL FROM. 

Nowadays, whenever a thought like that sneaks into my consciousness, I know that it's a blinking red light that's saying... THIS🚨IS🚨YOUR🚨WORK.

In other words, go ahead and ask yourself WHAT WOULD I THINK, and be honest with your answer. No matter what thought you think, it is an opportunity for growth and healing.

You'll either see that you are WAY NICER TO YOUR GAL-PALS THAN YOU ARE TO YOUR OWN DAMN SELF (holy wake-up call), or you'll see that you've got an opportunity to STOP GENERATIONAL SHAME in its tracks. 

Not gonna lie. This is hard work. 

But I'll tell you what... it is the WORTHIEST WORK I HAVE EVER DONE. 

Ever. 

When you are filled with tension and restlessness and criticism and judgment, you are GRIPPED. And I'll tell you what, I was GRIPPED for a long-ass time. 

That is not where JOY and BRAVERY and LOVE and TENDERNESS live. 

I believe you are worthy of all those things. 
I believe it's possible for you to be your own cheerleader.
I believe that right now, the world needs more joy-filled, brave, loving, tenderhearted women. 

No more "what will people think".

Only, WHAT WOULD I THINK? Said with conviction. Like the champion of women that you are.

Love, Stasia

PS. Registration for the NEXT SESSION OF STYLE SCHOOL opens on Friday, August 28th. This here is the work of Style School. YES, we talk about the clothes. We explore balance and proportion and color and jewelry and Inside Out Congruency. But we ALSO unpack generational shame, call out the lies we've been told and taught by people and institutions we "trust", and start renaming-reframing-unshaming the conversations we have with, and about, our incredible human bodies. 

I Took Off My Shirt, and It Was No BIG Deal.

I have an ANNOUNCEMENT I'd like to make. Seems that once summer rolls around, we start forgetting some really important things about having a human body. 

Did you know that it's TOTALLY NORMAL for your HUMAN BODY to have stretch marks? And cellulite? And scars?

Did you know that it's TOTALLY NORMAL for your HUMAN BODY to have jiggly bits and wobbly bits, hairy bits and bony bits, saggy bits and fleshy bits, muscular bits and perky bits? 

Did you know that it's TOTALLY NORMAL for your HUMAN BODY to change... without asking for permission!

😳😳😳

I know. That's not what we're taught.

We're taught that our today-body is supposed to be the same as our yesterday-body. And that CHANGE is only good if it happens in one direction ---> younger, slimmer, stronger, smoother. 

Gals, there's not a single one of us who's getting any younger. That's not how BIOLOGY works.

And guess what? Your HUMAN BODY didn't get the memo that its primary job is to be slimmer - stronger - smoother. 

Far as your body knows... its job is to do HUMAN BODY THINGS, like heal and grow and age and adapt and love and feel and delight and breathe and sense and experience and JUST BE A HUMAN BODY. 

We tend to THINK that OUR bodies are the worst kind of bodies. That OUR bodies are a problem. That OUR bodies are worse-off than other human bodies. 

And I'll tell you what. That kind of thinking is nothing but nonsensical horse shit. But you bet your bottom dollar I believed it. I thought MY cellulite was the WORST cellulite. I thought MY body was the worst kind of body. I thought that everybody else had it easier than me. I thought that I was the unlucky one... the one with "the curse".

Well guess what. MY BODY IS NOT A PROBLEM. And neither is yours.

We only THINK our cellulite, our scars, our stretch marks, our jiggly / wiggly / wobbly bits are a problem because we've been taught to believe they're a problem.  

But gals, the "training" and the "shaming" we've received is nothing but a big old money-making, woman-oppressing LIE. 

I've been doing the hard work of renaming - reframing - unshaming what it means to have a human body for YEARS, and hell if I still don't come upon residual body shame, tucked deep into the corners of my consciousness. 

In the last two weeks, I discovered two OPPRESSIVE BODY SHAMING RULES I've carried with me for my whole damn life.

GOOD-FOR-NOTHING-RULE-NUMBER-1:  For YEARS I've seen folks strip off their tees on the summit to let their shirts dry and to feel the summit breeze against their skin. For YEARS I've watched with longing eyes, but NEVER thought it was ok for me to take off MY shirt.

What in the world?!

I had no "good" rational or reason... just an "I wish I could do that", followed by some kind of internal yammering that sounded like this:

What will people think?
Who does she think SHE is?
She's too old for that!

ALL NONSENSE. All imaginary. All none of my business. 

So a couple of weeks ago, when I was hiking in Acadia National Park, I TOOK MY SHIRT OFF ON THE SUMMIT of the Bubbles, laid my t-shirt out to dry, and enjoyed the summit breeze on my belly. 

And guess what? It was NO BIG DEAL!

As we got ready to head down, I put on my t-shirt, and felt wicked PROUD for breaking THAT silly good-for-nothing rule. 

And then it occurred to me... I HAD ANOTHER RULE. 

GOOD-FOR-NOTHING-RULE-NUMBER-2: You know when it's about 900 degrees hazy-hot-and-humid outside, and your t-shirt sticks to you like whoa, so you take off your t-shirt and hike/bike/run/do yoga in just your sports bra??

Well, I had rule about that too. 

Shit. 

So this past weekend, when we were hiking up in the Northeast Kingdom of Vermont, I decided NOT TO WEAR A T-SHIRT HIKING. 

Scandalous, I know. 

And guess what? IT WAS NO BIG DEAL. 

Because it IS no big deal.

I'm a woman. With a human body. That does good human body things. 

Listen gals, if you're feeling self conscious of your scars, your dimples, your stretch marks, your legs, your butt, your belly, your boobs, your arms, your neck, your back, your chin, your eyes, your ears, your fingers, your kneecaps, your ankles, your wrists, your WHATEVER, that is SHAME talking. 

You DO NOT CURE SHAME by changing your body - comparing your body - wishing you had a different body - hating other bodies. You cure shame by changing how you VIEW + VALUE HUMAN BODIES.

ALL HUMAN BODIES.

No matter their size, their shape, their color, their anything. 

Period.

Whatever oppressive shame-rules you've got tucked away inside the recesses of your mind, examine them. Challenge them. And my goodness, BREAK THEM. 

I mean it.

What ONE good-for-nothing RULE do you have that you're ready to BREAK? 

Afraid to wear big earrings? DO IT.
Afraid to wear shorts? DO IT.
Afraid to wear a tank top? DO IT. 
Afraid to take off your cover-up? DO IT.
Afraid to wear a bikini? DO IT.
Afraid to wear lipstick? DO IT.
Afraid to wear a brightly colored face mask? DO IT.
Afraid to mix patterns. DO IT.

You've got ONE BODY, and it deserves to be treated like PURE GOLD. 

xo Stasia 

P.S. Registration for the next session of Style School opens on Friday, August 28th. Standing up to BODY SHAME takes guts, and in Style School, we flex our BRAVE MUSCLES every.single.day because WE ARE GUTSY WOMEN, and we are DONE hiding our incredible human bodies!

Jeans Getting Snug? Here's what to do about it.

My jeans are feeling a little snug.  Not TOO snug, but they're sitting at the upper margins of "comfortable", and I know that if my body changes just a wee bit more, they are gonna start to hurt my feelings.  

And when that happens... I'll have to move BUY NEW PANTS to the top of my priority list.  I don't mean my "shopping" priority list. I mean my LIFE priority list. 

Gals, you and I need pants that fit our bodies.

Buying pants to fit your body as it changes is not "giving in" or "giving up."
Buying pants to fit your body as it changes is a way of giving LOVE.

MY body has changed in the last month... which is to be expected, because I have a human body, and human bodies change.

Sometimes my body changes for no "good" reason.
Sometimes my body changes when I'm going through some-emotional-thing.  
Sometimes my body changes because my routine changes.

Best I can figure, my body changed THIS TIME because my routines fell to shit around the holidays AND and I was nursing a couple of new injuries. Four months into my learn-how-to-do-a-cartwheel (FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE) practice, I pulled my groin muscle something wicked AND got bursitis in my right wrist. 

(Yes, it's true. I've NEVER in my life done a cartwheel. Not even when I was a kid. And at 45, I've decided to learn. Every week after my hip-hop class, I receive private cartwheel instruction from my dance teacher, Toni. It's scary, and embarrassing, and hard, and gets ALL the negative-voices-inside-my-head roaring their mighty roar. But I'm committed. Not ONLY because I want to learn how to do a cartwheel, but because it's a great lesson in going toe-to-toe with shame, and getting-over-my-damn-self.)

Between the cartwheel injuries and the holiday madness, I didn't dance OR practice my cartwheels OR go for a walk, not even once.  (I DID get out for my weekly Sunday hikes, and squeeze in two dance-yoga classes at Kripalu during my teaching weekend, but I took it easy, and did a ton of stretching.)

MY BODY IS RESPONDING to my lack of movement and all of the yummy meals I ate around the holidays. And you know what... I'm not mad at my body for changing.

Why?

BECAUSE BODIES CHANGE. I worked my body a little too hard during my cartwheel practice, and it responded with injury. So I had to slow down. And when I slowed down, I gained a few pounds. 

BIG DEAL. 

Weight gain isn't something to fear.  It doesn't mean you should feel ashamed of yourself. 

Of course, that's not what we're taught. We're taught that if we gain weight, then we've failed - that we've "let ourselves go" - that we're lazy.

We're made to feel ASHAMED when our bodies change.  

You guys. Bodies change.

They change for all kinds of reasons, whether we like it or not. 
My body's job isn't to be pretty and to stay the same size. 

My body's job is to be a human body. 
MY JOB is to take care of my human body.
So that my body can take care of me.

For me, that means eating foods that make my body feel energized, hiking on Sundays, walking my kids to and from school, and going to dance class. It also means slowing down when I get an injury. 

It doesn't mean pushing myself THROUGH an injury because I'm afraid of what will happen to my body if I stop moving/exercising. It doesn't mean obsessively restricting my food intake, and counting my calories while my body is healing. And when/if my pants become too small, it doesn't mean I'm going to punish my body by wearing too-small pants that squeeze my guts and make my crotch burn when I sit down because they're so tight!! 

That's just... mean. That's what bullies do. And I refuse to be a bully to my body. 

Yet... how many of you have done this?  

I know, I have too.  I used to do this ALL THE TIME.  Not anymore though. I've wised up to the brainwashing tricks of the multi-bajillion-dollar-industrial-diet-complex that has, in the past, highjacked my good sense and convinced me that I should feel ashamed for "letting" my body change. 

So here I am, in my today-body, wearing pants that I have filled to the brim, and feeling good about it; I'm making a conscious decision to honor my body as it changes... not punish it. 

This is what unconditional (body) love "looks" like. And I threw "looks" in quotes there, because loving your body has NOTHING to do with what your body actually LOOKS like.  It has to do with how you TREAT your body, not just when it's behaving the way you want it to, but when it's changing WITHOUT your express permission. 

I wanna know... how do YOU honor your body when it changes? Is it something that comes easy for you? Or do you have to work at it? 

I know I have to work at it, every damn day. But I gotta tell you, I think it's worth it. 

#mybodyisnotaproblem #itstheculture

xo Stasia 

Wear the Damn Swimsuit

While trekking cross-country on one of our epic summer adventures, I was invited to a July 4th neighborhood pool-party in Fort Collins, Colorado, hosted by my friend’s boyfriend's ex-wife. (Seemingly random, but nothing ever is!)

I put on my cheeky bikini and a cute little dress, walked my fabulous ass right into the pool gates, and then... outta thin air, I came face to face with one of my BIGGEST most POWERFUL self-image-saboteurs. 

FIT-STRONG-MUSCULAR WOMEN. EVERYWHERE. 

It was as if I had just walked onto the set of an Athleta catalog photo-shoot. 

I became dizzy with shame. I immediately had this vision of all the fit-party-people stopping, staring, and chanting BIG LEGS BIG LEGS BIG LEGS BIG LEGS. 

(Thanks thrift-store, body-shamer, for planting THAT in my head!)

It took everything I had to DISRUPT the onslaught of shaming thoughts. 

My body is not a problem.
My body is a good body.
Do not let SHAME hijack you from the anticipated fun and freedom you felt 5 minutes ago.

Once I put down my things, I stood at the pool's edge, heart beating in my ears, and I KNEW I had to take off the damn dress. I knew I had to BE IN MY BODY. I knew I could NOT let SHAME take me down. 

I took a deep breath, slowly slipped off my dress... and nothing happened. Nothing at all. 

There I was, ready to be the center of the most epic ridicule-pool-azza ever to be seen on planet earth, and nobody noticed me.

Talk about anticlimactic!

Once the dress was off, and I recognized the sensational-shame-story for what it was - BULLSHIT - I relaxed and immediately started to feel the ease and freedom I’m accustomed to feeling in my cheeky-bikini. 

And then, outta the blue, I hear... "Stasia?!"

I turned around, and standing right in front of me was a beautiful, bright-eyed woman - a woman I’d never seen before.

"OMG, YOU'RE AT MY POOL!!  I just popped in to drop off my son, and I saw you. I thought, OMG is that STASIA AT MY POOL!  I follow you on Instagram!!  I just had to come say hi! I can't believe you're AT MY POOL.  Don't you live in Vermont? Why are you at my neighborhood pool? Eep! I am sooooo inspired!  You practice what you preach!!  YOU'RE WEARING A BIKINI AT MY POOL!" 

And then my heart started beating in my ears again. OMG-THE-IRONY.

One minute I'm bracing myself for the most epic ridicule-pool-azza ever.  The next I'm standing tall and proud in my cheeky-bikini, taking a picture with my new friend, who I met because I was serendipitously invited to a pool-party by my friend's boyfriend's ex-wife.

People often say to me, “I wish I felt about my body the way that you feel about your body!” or “I’d never be brave enough to wear a bikini!”

But, I’m here to tell you. This didn’t come naturally to me either! No way!

I didn't CURE BODY SHAME by changing my body. I SLAYED IT by intentionally disrupting my shaming thoughts, and reminding myself of something that I understand to be intellectually true: #mybodyisnotaproblem.

In short, I practice.

I PRACTICE disrupting my shame thoughts like a ninja.
I PRACTICE gratitude for my today-body. 
I PRACTICE LOVING and befriending my body.
I PRACTICE setting boundaries that support the way I want to feel in my body.

THIS IS THE WORK, sisters.  You understand that getting good at anything takes practice. Intentional, specific, targeted PRACTICE. And being in your body, in a swimsuit, is no different.

Learning to accept, honor, appreciate and even LOVE your body, doesn’t come easy for most of us! And it’s no wonder! We live in an extremely body shaming culture.

BUT, these beliefs that we hold so tightly as fact, are actually NOT true. And you don’t have to live as if they are.

If you want the culture to change, then you best start changing, because gals, WE ARE THE CULTURE.

It's time to let go of the old self-sabotaging body shame stories that keep you stuck in the muck, and replace them with more loving, more tender, my accepting BELIEFS that support you, not hurt you.

It's a LIFE LONG PRACTICE.  One that enables you to fully integrate hella big TRUTHS into your heart, mind and soul, over the long haul. 

This work of healing body shame, and embodying a confident, joyful, grounded, loving presence takes time and deserves to be taken OFF of a quick-fix timeline. 

We all have body shame. And none of our bodies are actually are problem.

YOU CAN practice and LEARN a new way to relate to your body.

Let’s practice together.

xo Stasia